Sooner or later young people will leave their home and enjoy a new form of independence. These tips will be for them.
Moving out of home – tips for young people – Better Health Channel
Most people move out of the family home and set up their own place during their late teens to late 20s. Whether or not leaving goes smoothly depends on the reasons you are moving out and the nature of the relationship you have with your family.
You may decide to leave home for many different reasons, including:
It’s common to be a little unsure when you make a decision like leaving home. Think about:
You may choose to move, but find that you face problems you didn’t anticipate, such as:
Before parents say good bye, they should prepare them for what lies ahead when they leave home.
Help your kid be ready to leave home | North Shore News
Twenty-eight-year-old Devon spends his days doing very little.
He wakens late and helps himself to breakfast from the variety of foods purchased by his parents. When he finally decides to get dressed he just has to choose from all the nicely cleaned and ironed clothing waiting in his closet. Then he pops open a beer and watches TV until his parents come home and prepare his dinner. After dinner, he borrows one of his parents’ cars and heads off to party with his friends.
Devon’s parents are not very happy about this state of affairs and complain to all their friends.
With Devon they drop hints. They bookmark career pages, job listings and educational opportunity pages on his computer. They ask him about his plans. They suggest jobs, school or at the very least moving out. He just ignores them These are typically the same parents who 15 years ago were happily doing everything for him. When I ask parents why they are not teaching their children the skills they will need to be independent, they tell me that it’s just easier and faster to do it for them.
When I ask them if they have talked about the future with their kids, they tell me that they hope their child stays home forever. They love having him with them and can’t imagine him leaving. Ever.
Children tend to meet and often exceed our expectations, and that includes low expectations as well as high ones. Parents who are not facing the fact that it is their job to help their kids be ready to leave home, to handle chores such as doing laundry, cooking and cleaning as well as earning a living, budgeting, and paying bills are simply not doing their job. When we give our kids the message that we want them to stay home, that we like doing everything for them, most are willing to comply.
And much as we think that asking them to learn how to fend for themselves is too much work, it is as important as encouraging them to take their first steps, speak their first words and read.
Read a first hand experience on leaving home. Note the preparation, the costs and the emotions involved.
Packed Up and Almost Ready To Leave Home – My First Apartment
I was talking with a friend of mine a while ago and she asked me, “How does it feel to be packing up and moving out?” I told her it feels great, but I didn’t feel like I was giving the full answer to that question. I thought it would be as simple as packing, organizing, and moving but I went through a few stages of work & emotion during the process.
The first thing I did was to go to my local stores and ask for cardboard boxes they weren’t using. Many stores told me they have a box crushing machine they use to recycle so they didn’t have any. I got lucky though and I was able to snag about 6 boxes on my first trip. I just kept on going back to my lucky stores until I got all I needed. I also used a few plastic bins I had from college. I was excited to be running around and starting my packing process. Also, the packing supplies were totally free and if there’s a way to save money in any situation, I’m there! I had done a bit of online shopping for my apartment so those boxes came in handy, too. MyFirstApartment has another post that offers a few more options for finding packing boxes and Alex has posted about a green packing solution if you’re a grossed out by using store give-away cartons.
When I got my first set of boxes, I started to pack immediately. I figured since we’re transitioning into summer, I can pack away my winter belongings and not miss them. Surprisingly, I found myself throwing out a lot of things with that round of packing. The amount of disgustingly worn boots and mismatched gloves I found under my bed and in my closet was embarrassing. It felt great to clean up though. Then I decided to tackle the bottom of my closet. I don’t even think tackle is a strong enough word to use, maybe excavating is more like it. I was down there for hours separating the wants & needs from the garbage. This is where things started to get tricky for me.
I found so many memories in my closet. Pictures, ticket stubs, maps, party/resort bracelets; anything you can think of, I found. (Except food, I’m not that messy.) These memories made the process much longer than it should have been as I reminisced every time I picked something up. I went from happy to sad to annoyed, to confused, back to happy again. All of this discovery left me with one thought; I’m starting another life. Soon, I’ll have another closet to stuff memories made in the apartment it’s housed it. It was kind of surreal.
As time went on, I packed up my books (which took up 5 boxes themselves), important papers, CD’s, electronics with the exception of my laptop and iPod, DVD’s, and my personal kitchen ware and appliances. After that round of packing, my room started to look very bare. The only things that were on my dresser were my hair/skin products and my record player. I couldn’t let go of my vinyl, not yet. I think this was the point when I knew there was no return. Even though I know I’m always welcome in my mother’s home, I started to feel like a stranger in the house. It almost felt like I had come to stay until I got back on my feet and I’ve overstayed my welcome. I feel stupid for feeling that way but I just started to get used to the reality that I wouldn’t be living there anymore.
The last things I have to pack are my everyday clothes/shoes, toiletries, and linens. That’ll be done when I have a U-Haul scheduled to come to the house. Looking at all that I’ve done so far, I can’t believe I own so much stuff! My basement is lined wall-to-wall with boxes. But when I look at those boxes, I feel a different emotion every time. They excite me, make me nervous, and anger me when I stub my toe on one of them. Overall, they’re a great sight to see. They’re the symbol of complete independence, adventures, and new beginnings for me. I’m sure I’ll be feeling a whole new set of emotions on moving day but for now, I’ll just ride the boxes and bubble wrap wave.
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